Funny Bird Quotes Mincing Mockingbird Wallpapers
See a Problem?
Thanks for telling us about the problem.
Friend Reviews
Community Reviews
yeah. now you're willing to listen, aren't you??
this book delights me.
it's just a collection of illustrations of various horrible winged creatures with accompanying stories declaring itself to be a reference guide to be consulted in the event of an infant or small child being torn apart by a murder of crows.
because it's going to happen, make no mistake.
for such small little things, they sure do get lippy (beaky?)
so for all of you who have been questioning my stance on birds and how they are evil
yeah. now you're willing to listen, aren't you??
this book delights me.
it's just a collection of illustrations of various horrible winged creatures with accompanying stories declaring itself to be a reference guide to be consulted in the event of an infant or small child being torn apart by a murder of crows.
because it's going to happen, make no mistake.
for such small little things, they sure do get lippy (beaky?)
and always with the threats.
and this particular one:
comes with the following chilling story:
"I've taken an eye from a cat for every hummingbird brother and sister lost to their feline featherlust. And I'll take them until the burning furnace of rage that flares in my breast dies like the implosion of a sun. Until then, cat blindness will increase incrementally until every goddamned cat on the block is walking in circles."
yikes.
and you do not want to know what the hens did to the dog in a later story.
birds do not mess around. and even though you might think they are all pretty with their colors and tweetings and their adorably disgusting behavior,
generally, creatures that exhibit that degree of drunkenly inappropriate and antisocial behavior are the ones you need to fear the most.
dear god…
don't say i haven't been warning you all for years.
oh my god and look at these other books he has of evil bird paintings. i adore them i neeeed them:
come to my blog!
BIRDS ARE LUV, BIRDS ARE LYF.
Just the sight of these feathered creatures of evil gives me the heebie-jeebies, but then when I see this...
BIRDS ARE LUV, BIRDS ARE LYF.
...more
Picked this up on a whim. Perfect for anyone who has ever felt unnerved by a flock of birds. Are they watching me? Will they kill me? The answer is apparently…yes.
Picked this up on a whim. Perfect for anyone who has ever felt unnerved by a flock of birds. Are they watching me? Will they kill me? The answer is apparently…yes.
...more
The book is a collection of acrylic paintings of birds accompanied by text superimposed over the image, a caption beneath the image, a short vignette, or a combination thereof.Pros
- The book contains a number of meme-worthy imagines that have made the rounds on the internet (e.g. the bird that would sell you to Satan for a single corn chip)
- The paintings are fine, I guess?
- The book can be completed very quickly, if that's your jam.Cons
- The book is only about 60 pages long. The g 1.5 / 5Summary
The book is a collection of acrylic paintings of birds accompanied by text superimposed over the image, a caption beneath the image, a short vignette, or a combination thereof.Pros
- The book contains a number of meme-worthy imagines that have made the rounds on the internet (e.g. the bird that would sell you to Satan for a single corn chip)
- The paintings are fine, I guess?
- The book can be completed very quickly, if that's your jam.Cons
- The book is only about 60 pages long. The going rate for this book is $15 (for the hardcover), meaning the book costs $0.25 per page.
- There is a fair amount of punching down in the book, with everything from, "The week in Tijuana with Manuela the junkie lady who was really a man, was, in hindsight, a mistake," to, "I sure wish I could get out of this huggin' suit so I could fill my shoes full of applesauce." Conclusion
Edgy meme-lords may enjoy this book, but most would be better off just looking at the pictures included in other reviews of this book. I was neither moved nor impressed by this work, and find it hard to recommend it to anyone (especially for the asking price).
See more reviews at Quinn's Curios.
...more
Remember Jack Handey and his "Deep Thoughts" from the old Saturday Night Live? Slightly off-kilter, vaguely inane and sort of gormless, but somehow deeply insightful, musings? Well, take that same sort of one-liner humor, but make it psychotically angry and twisted and use it to caption pretty, but intense, bird paintings. That's more or less what you get here.
Usually you don't have pretty, colorful, cute birds telling you "I'll Even Kill Y
Jack Handey as an Angry, Pugnacious Drunk in a Bird SuitRemember Jack Handey and his "Deep Thoughts" from the old Saturday Night Live? Slightly off-kilter, vaguely inane and sort of gormless, but somehow deeply insightful, musings? Well, take that same sort of one-liner humor, but make it psychotically angry and twisted and use it to caption pretty, but intense, bird paintings. That's more or less what you get here.
Usually you don't have pretty, colorful, cute birds telling you "I'll Even Kill Your Soul". The occasional brief, unnerving comments and observations and stories that lead you from picture to picture just add to the wild wrongness of the whole setup and make this a deeply satisfying and essential guide. You ignore it at your peril.
...more
*I received a complimentary copy from the publisher.
This is a delightful, hilarious, "profusely illustrated" guide to birds...Troubled Birds. There are plenty of amusing details to savor in this short guide. It's one of those books that as I read it I keep thinking of some of my odd friends (who are the BEST) that would enjoy a copy of their own. Probably why they call it a 'gift book'. Figured that out on my own!*I received a complimentary copy from the publisher.
...more
Mostly I appreciate the author's humor, and I still like the notion of vindictive birds paying us back for putting windows in their flyways and a single chicken proving fatal to
I bought this book for my husband for the illustrations and the snarky tone when I peaked inside. He didn't like it at all. As a bird lover he found the satire over the top and even offensive. And it is true, there are nasty references here and the level of bird violence reaches the absurd, hence the dropping of a star.Mostly I appreciate the author's humor, and I still like the notion of vindictive birds paying us back for putting windows in their flyways and a single chicken proving fatal to intruders. It is the rowdy, sarcastic version of Hitchcock's The Birds.
What is missing is the promised guide that "enables anyone to quickly identify psychotic, violent or mentally unstable bird species." You will still be guessing about that sparrow.
...more
My only issue is I feel like it could've been longer. It felt over too quickly and abruptly. Perhaps it's shallow of me to knock off a star because of that, but I never said I wasn't petty.
My favorite
"The risk I took was calculate, but man, am I bad at math."
"The ability to remain sober and gracious is, indeed, a form of mild insanity."
"He had a violent, uncontrolle What an interesting, hilarious way to end 2017 for me. I probably shouldn't have been quite so darkly amused as I was.
My only issue is I feel like it could've been longer. It felt over too quickly and abruptly. Perhaps it's shallow of me to knock off a star because of that, but I never said I wasn't petty.
My favorite
"The risk I took was calculate, but man, am I bad at math."
"The ability to remain sober and gracious is, indeed, a form of mild insanity."
"He had a violent, uncontrolled temper, which sent him literally insane when annoyed, but he was good-looking."
"'This is wonderful!' 'This is going to be fine!' 'I love this!' I was soon to change my mind, however."
What some people might be uncomfortable reading about in this book because of personal opinion or belief: cursing, mentions of drugs, one specific passage called "sadomasochist woodland creature tells it like it is" which I hope gives you enough warning for what the content of that one is.
*I started with two based off memory but when I flipped through to quote them, I found the other two I liked and had to expand.
...more
(from p. 41)
"Oh, dear, honey - look out for that bird - oh, no. You hit it. You killed it."
"It flew into our windshield. I'm not swerving to avoid some stupid bird," he said.
Her mouth opened and closed wordlessly until the sounds came. "I think it said, 'F-ck your windshield.'"
He drove in silence for a long while, and she couldn't see his face in the dark.
Finally he said, "I think you're right," his voice small and hollow.
[image error]
WHY HAVE YOU NOT BOUGHTEN THIS BOOK ALREADY
(from p. 41)
"Oh, dear, honey - look out for that bird - oh, no. You hit it. You killed it."
"It flew into our windshield. I'm not swerving to avoid some stupid bird," he said.
Her mouth opened and closed wordlessly until the sounds came. "I think it said, 'F-ck your windshield.'"
He drove in silence for a long while, and she couldn't see his face in the dark.
Finally he said, "I think you're right," his voice small and hollow.
[image error]
WHY HAVE YOU NOT BOUGHTEN THIS BOOK ALREADY
...more
It's a short, silly book. Half paintings of birds with ridiculous captions, and half prose/poetry relating to bird actions. It made me laugh with it's stupidity. It made me laugh a lot.
Recommended for people with stupid senses of humour.
"I'm three ounces of whoop-ass"
I saw images from this book crop up on my Tumblr occasionally and they always made me laugh, so when I found out they were in a book, I knew I had to get it.It's a short, silly book. Half paintings of birds with ridiculous captions, and half prose/poetry relating to bird actions. It made me laugh with it's stupidity. It made me laugh a lot.
Recommended for people with stupid senses of humour.
"I'm three ounces of whoop-ass"
...more
His artwork is collected worldwide and has been featured in SUNSENT magazine, BUST magazine, COUNTRY LIVING magazine, the LOS ANGELES TIMES, the CHICAGO TRIBU
Matt Adrian's lush acrylic paintings of birds range from the delightfully cute to the decidedly sinister. The distinctive titles of the paintings juxtapose the primal existence of birds with the often awkward folly of modern human existence.His artwork is collected worldwide and has been featured in SUNSENT magazine, BUST magazine, COUNTRY LIVING magazine, the LOS ANGELES TIMES, the CHICAGO TRIBUNE, the BOSTON GLOBE, the SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE, DECOR8, APARTMENT THERAPY and on the television shows DEAR GENEVIEVE, NCIS: LOS ANGELES, DEXTER, and MODERN FAMILY. His work has appeared in the films THIS IS 40, THE HANGOVER PART III and will appear in the upcoming Johnny Depp film TRANSCENDENCE and the Spike Jonze film HER.
There have been two books published that collect his artwork: IT IS FOLLY TO ASSUME MY AWESOME LIES DORMANT: THE PAINTINGS OF THE MINCING MOCKINGBIRD VOLUME ONE and I HAVE HEARD MY PRAISES SUNG IN SCREAMS: THE PAINTINGS OF THE MINCING MOCKINGBIRD VOLUME TWO. His book THE MINCING MOCKINGBIRD GUIDE TO TROUBLED BIRDS will be published by Penguin in June 2014.
He lives in California with his wife, artist Kim Bagwill.
Source: .
...moreNews & Interviews
Welcome back. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account.
willifordadvalogiand.blogspot.com
Source: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18778792-guide-to-troubled-birds
Post a Comment for "Funny Bird Quotes Mincing Mockingbird Wallpapers"